A Happy Moment

Journal Entry from January 13, 2009

"Last night I was with two close friends walking around by the beach.It was probably about two in the morning and I left them behind and walked by myself for the equivalent of a block or two. It was dark...incredible. Silent. The houses were sleeping, the stars were yawning. The waves rolled over in their sleep, the foam curled up into the sand on the shore and sank between the rocks with contented sighs. 

The clouds raised their arms over their heads and stretched their toes across the sky before tucking their knees back into their chest...it was breath-taking. I felt like I had walked into nature's bedroom, a trespasser. Tip-toeing in, aware that I wasn't invited. I watched the heavens sleep, the earth dream, nature rest. 

I didn't belong, but I couldn't walk away. I stole sneaky glances at the sweet face of the earth snuggling into itself, away from the destruction and chaos of human interaction."

5 Things Which Restore my Love for Humanity

Thank you, Juno, for coining my more recent feelings toward humankind.

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However, don't lose hope. This is a blog about things I love and therefore I have complied 5 things to drive away the 'People-Suck' blues...absorb and feel the love for the things that others have created or experienced.

I want to take more cabs after hearing this...

If the Michael Jackson cabbie video didn't make you want to take call a taxi, this will. And it might make you cry like a baby like I did.

-THE CAB RIDE I'LL NEVER FORGET.-

Ah...the classic Drunk Octopus. He'd never get past a cop with those drunk eyes!

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There are no words to explain this final lecture of a university professor. Warning: there is a great chance you will not finish this video the same person as when you started it.

And, if you're a huge mess now, just remember the wise words of Dr. Seuss: 'Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened.'

This is one of many incredible pictures of street art that can be found here. That's right...you are looking at a mural.

5 Things for 5 Senses

Today is a list of 5 awesome things for all of our five delightful senses: sight, hearing, touch, smell and taste.

First of all, let's kick 'er off with sight. I adore images where a quick moment is captured and frozen mid-point...a raindrop falling, an explosion exploding; you name it, I love it (Thank you Mythbusters for making me love things slowed down)! For today, I present The Epic Bubble Pop.

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There's nothing like the sound of a bongo drum jam session. If you've never been at the beach on a hot summer night, surrounded with cheap wine, off-key singing, and the heartbeat of worn-out bongos...well, You've missed out. Some of my favorite memories involve Mexican blankets, stars, the waves and a drum. But don't take my word for the beauty of it...listen.

When I need some time to think, throwing pottery is one of the best ways to clear my mind. I have an old kick wheel and it makes this great hum when the momentum smooths out. Everything feels quieter around me and I can center on my hands, and how the slightest touch ripples through the clay in a perfect, seamless movement. I love the feeling of wet clay moving through my fingers. It's like socially acceptable mud-pies I suppose.

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The smell of a fresh summer rain on musty pavement always gets me. It's that smell of old buildup washing away, of the air clearing.

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I love the taste of ice cream. It's not only the taste of ice cold chocolate and vanilla, but it's also the taste of road trips and the line for the ice cream truck in the cul-de-sac. It's the taste of sticky fingers and not knowing what calories were, and the taste of success over having finished all the peas at dinner time. Ice cream brings me back to days where the biggest decisions were over sprinkles or nuts.

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Abstractions

"I'm tired of living in a world that says people only come together when faced with catastrophe." -Shane Koyczan

What would the world be like if we loved just because we can? Not because we expect anything back, not because the other deserves it, or out rightly needs it. What if we lived to love, because we loved to love, and because we were in love with loving other's ability to love and receive love just for the sake...of loving love?

Hear me out before you decide to close this blog and take a seizure medication. What if we loved attempts and failures in real life? In a movie, the underdog is the star...we cry for them, laugh with them, yell from our couches "YOU CAN DO IT FORREST!" What do we say to the single mom who hands us our burger at McDonalds? Do we say anything to her? We love the kid who tries to ride a bike, help them up when they fall. What do we say to the drug addict who falls back into his lifestyle? Do we help them up? Even if you can see, and love, the underdogs around you...what about yourself? What do you say to yourself when you gain five pounds, can't get past 'Smoke on the Water' in guitar lessons, or can't seem to pass that one class, or get that promotion you've been in line for? What if we loved ourselves with the patience that comes when we take away expectations? Live to love...out of love flourishes confidence and peace. And with unconditional love usually comes the desire to become better, to be worthy of that love; love ignites passion. If we lived in a world driven by love, intentional love that is based off of specific choices rather than emotion, the emotions that will grow would grow us.

Before you assume I'm a hippie who loves everything, I don't. I'm a pessimist who doesn't trust, doesn't feel worthy of love, and doesn't like to feel vulnerable, open, or forgiving. I'm hard on myself; I judge others quickly. This whole blog was birthed out of a realization that I'm walking through my world with blinders on, filtering beauty through my hardened, critical, logical worldview. I'm tired of that. I woke up a few days ago and it occurred to me that I need to start focusing on intentional love. So here I am, with this blog being one way to focus my thoughts each day on things around me that I adore. What I'm saying is that I know from experience that it's not an easy proposition, but I believe it is a necessary one, at least for my own life. By the way, have you ever noticed how the most difficult things are usually the best for us long term?

Today I'm choosing to love. I will love you without expectations. I will love you even if you have expectations on me (ever noticed how hard that is to do?). I will love myself even when I fail, and I will continue to love the challenge of loving those who are sometimes just not so lovable. Because, I'm starting to realize, a life without love is a failure in itself.

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If the sun, situated specifically to provide life-giving light, was ever absent, darkness and death would take over; growth would stop. What if we are situated specifically to love, and that love is largely absent? I think we would be exactly where we are, with emotional darkness and death taking over...if we want to grow, we need to love.

More Things

It's technically February 2nd, so I'm going to do list for the day now before I go to bed, as Wednesdays are usually more than a little insane around here. That's really just an excuse though...I've been writing an essay and am wired in a thinking/writing mode. With that, I'm going to kick this off with number 1.

I love perspective. When I saw this picture I realized how drastically I jump around on both ends of the spectrum; it is a rare occurrence in which I toss in the perfect intelligent comment into a conversation. Interestingly enough, the older I get the more I am going from being the teenager without a filter, notorious for saying too much too often, to being an adult who feels too quiet instead. Maybe it's the writer quirk in me, I have yet to really establish what caused the change. At any rate, my words and thoughts feel trapped, stuck. It literally takes a pen or a keyboard to get myself out of my own head. Even describing this fact takes my blog! This quote reminded me that my own silence can be just as devastating, to myself and those around me, as my word-vomit used to be.

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I love cookies, specifically home-ade and then tossed in the freezer for a couple hours. Yeah, I went there. And bunnies are awesome too which is why this picture is now officially one of my favorite things.

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I love testing my limits; challenging my own capabilities. I don't do it often enough though, and this picture of a kayaking trip at English Bay reminded me how much I adore fresh experiences. There's nothing quite like that feeling of fear before going into a new situation. It's nearly paralyzing at times. I remember climbing into the kayak, wondering if it'd be in the evening news how some girl forgot how to Eskimo roll and then drowned tragically in her flipped kayak. But then the ocean was moving beneath me, and suddenly the clouds were racing by overhead. The paddle cut through the waves in this fluid rhythm and I laughed and then was silent in awe of how powerful and vulnerable I was simultaneously. Moments where both of those realizations are working in harmony are beautiful...I'd say a little fear is worth that.

Now, let me explain that there is nothing that I love more than a clean kitchen. I realize the picture below is not necessarily the most sanitary or beautiful kitchen, per se, but what I love here is a moment frozen in time. I love museums and pictures where it looks like a normal family had a normal day, and then just didn't come home. Left all the little details, imperfections and reality, scattered wherever they had left them. I wonder when I leave my house sometimes what would happen if I got murdered, or if I stepped off my bus and a car hit me, or if there was a shooting at the bus loop. What would people think of me, of who I was or wanted to be, if they walked into my bedroom? I wonder if there would be a large disconnect to them between my dreams and how my day to day life is? Would they notice it as much as I do sometimes? They'd see a bit of mess, a few lists and journals that are so honest I consider burning them sometimes. Pictures like these make me smile because it catches those little things that usually get cleaned up before people are invited in...the important things like handprints on the cupboards and little alphabet letters on the fridge.

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I love to hike...mountains, trees, sweat and granola bars are all happy things in my book. The view doesn't hurt either!

Because How Can I Not Love This?

Events tonight made me think of this song, which then made me laugh. And, as we all know, this blog is specifically to document little things like that around me that I love for whatever reason. So, for your listening pleasure, a trip back to a simpler time.

And...also. :)

Things I Find Irresistible

Today my heart is meditating on potential. What drives it, what cuts it short. From what I've seen so far, the answer seems to be that I am the only one who can make or break my future. It makes me think...if I dream really big, and am not scared of the work and failures along the way...who do I really want to be? Am I following my dreams or am I already making practicality a forefront requirement of my career and location and passion?

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I adore used bookstores ( and the quote is fantastic as well). There's just that slight musty drag that always brings me back to my Grandparent's bookshelves full of Tennyson and Jack London. I love the little inscriptions found in the covers, finding quotes underlined by someone who the words meant something profound to.

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I love cozy, warm knit slipper-socks. They are a wrap-your-toes-up-and-keep-you-smiling sort of treat for a cold February day. A mouthful for the feet?

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I love colour...these bright bursts of shiny paint are inspiring me to crack out my own palette for an afternoon of creating.

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Everything about this 'beach cruiser' screams: "RIDE. ME." I love the colour, the curves and that basket begging to be filled with wildflowers, a straw hat, and a notebook.

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